The deep end.

Treading water in the deep end, an unfamiliar colored pool, with strange wave patterns and lane lines separating people all swimming the opposite direction. Nothing to hold on to.

It's pretty incredible how much change goes into a move like this. I sold off so much of what I owned, and yes, it was great because material things simply don't matter, but to pack your life up into a suitcase is really kind of hard. There was a lot I had to leave behind. The little things all seem to add up and suddenly I am overcome with emotion. To something as stupid as not having a mobile number and feeling completely disconnected to not having anyone to hug me after a hard day at the office. I think a big part of the tough adjustment is the fact that I'm now house sitting for my coach but have no means of transportation (aside from my bicycle which I am already riding more than I care to discuss). I feel a bit locked in and suffocated as a result. I'd venture to guess that if I had a scooter and a way to get out and explore, to go hang out at the beach and to see more of the coast that it wouldn't all be as tough. However, for the time being, having nothing to do but train has only succeeded in making me miss things like American TV programing. I never thought I could miss American television, but I do.

I have already exhausted the You Tube supply of America's Next Top Model and Project Runway and have actually now moved on to watching old seasons of Australia's Next Top Model. Unfortunately, being over here, I can't go to the American network websites to watch episodes of current shows and none of the network shows make their way to You Tube, for long, because of copyright laws.

As for my training, everything is new. I have so many technical changes to think about that my brain is constantly spinning whilst my body is on fire. I have been advised to wake up certain muscles that I don't think I have ever engaged before. That, is no easy task. I have pretty stubborn hamstrings that like to try to do everything for all of my other muscles and they are putting up a pretty good fight. I have new stretches, new recovery plans and ride volumes that blow my old training wide open.

There is so much new and so much unfamiliar that it is easy to become overwhelmed. I actually finally gave in to it and came down with a cold late last week. Fortunately, we caught it early on and made smart decisions so I only really lost 1 afternoon of training to it.

So, right now I am just plotting along, day by day, just trying to tackle my training and keep the rest of the uncertainty and anxiety in a place where it can leak out at a manageable rate.